9 weeks…something adjusted

My littlest guy turns 9 weeks today. Feels like a lifetime, so much longer than 9 weeks. 

He is doing amazing. Growing, feeding great and sleeping. Having a baby that sleeps is a wonderful thing. Maverick was a horrible sleeper, 2.5 years of being a zombie. This one is awesome. Don’t want to rub it in…I hate those mothers.

But it’s given me a better chance to recover…or so we thought. 

After I had my non-infected stent removed at the beginning of the month, it all seemed like the health issues where done and dusted. My infection levels were coming down and liver function was heading back to normal. I slowly started having a few leaks. I thought it was a bad case of incontinence, it happens after baby comes. You do your pelvic floor, you deal with it. You cross your legs when you sneeze, and get on with life. 

Except it got worse. I was waking up covered in wee. Lovely right? I was soaking pads in under an hour. Changing clothes constantly. Lots of tears. Lots of washing. 

I saw my surgeon who agreed it wasn’t normal and sent me for a CT scan. The results showed a small hole in my bladder. Not good news. The urologist was pissed (pun intended) that this had happened after the last surgery and after all his test had shown no leakage. 

The decision was to have a catheter for awhile to see if it would heal itself. 

I’m on day 4 and already over it. A bag strapped to my leg all day, every day is just the shits. It makes it hard to move, to play with my kids and to sleep. And don’t get me started on bladder spasms. 

I have my next cystogram in 2 weeks which will hopefully show the hole has been fixed. If not, it will be back to the operating theatre. They said it wasn’t easy surgery either. Right now, anything is easier than what I’ve been through. 

When all this is over, I’m celebrating. Maybe a glass of bubbles. Maybe a whole bottle!


Day 13: welcome home!

Today we came home from hospital. Both of us. Leaving no one behind. 

And I couldn’t be happier. 

It has been a crazy 18 days and to think my little guy should still be on the inside for almost a month. 

There were tears upon leaving the NICU but not sad ones. It just felt weird after being in one place for so long, being told to enjoy my baby and head home. 

He has come a long way these last 13 days. From being born at 34 weeks 2 days to being allowed out at 36 weeks 1 day. He passed all his checks with flying colours and I am so thankful. 

He’s slept all afternoon, fed wonderfully and just been a delight. Ask me tomorrow how it’s going and I’m sure I’ll be answering differently. 

Me? I’m doing ok. I’ve come home with a catheter still in because of the damage done to my bladder. I get a cystogram done on Monday (where they put dye in my bladder and check for leaks) and a pelvic scan on Wednesday then a baby check Friday and a urology check for me that day too. So I’ll be spending more time at the hospital but it will be worth it to make sure I’m healthy. 

Our healthcare system really truly rocks. 

But overall I’m doing pretty good. I’m not sure how I’ll go mentally in the near future and I’m sure I’ll need some help along the way. Looking at my scar is heartbreaking. And I know it will fade over time, but scars are there forever and it will remind me of this shit time and what I went through to get my family.   

that’s a lot of staples that were in my stomach!

 Just glad I never have to go through this again.