I did it! I have finally finished and I feel GREAT!
I weaned Maverick. He’s almost 17 months old and I am super proud of myself. I never ever thought I’d breastfeed for this long, but I did.
Originally I had 12 months in my head, but then I got thinking (like I always do) that why stop? It’s not long enough. I haven’t done a good enough job. It’s only just getting started…blah blah…I got inside my own head and started talking down to myself.
Which in fact, 16 months IS great. I HAVE done an amazing job. I pat myself on the back.
Another good thing about this is he seems to be sleeping a bit better. If you know the back stories, he has been a terrible sleeper for his whole life. But all of a sudden, he is sleeping for 2-3 hours during the day and up to 5-6 hours in one stretch at night.
2 nights ago I had 6 hours sleep without him. I tell you, I felt wonderful in the morning. Apart from waking up at 4.30am, I still felt really good.
I always felt guilty (my head going full steam again) about ending feeding Marshal when he was 6 months old. As he was mix fed due to my health issues, I always had those guilt feelings with EVERY feed but when it ended, the emotional roller-coaster was terrifying.
This time, I didn’t have that. I tried a few weeks ago, but wasn’t ready. This time, I was. I just knew. He seems ok with it which I guess has helped.
I’ve just go to keep remembering that I’ve done my best and he is healthy, happy (most of the time) and alive.